Monday, 16 May 2011

Cognitive behavioural therapy - Session one

As I have blogged about before,  I do have a problem in the shape of anxiety and panic attacks.  I have had a short course of cognitive behavioural therapy  over a year ago and was awaiting the start of a high intensity, 12 week individual course.  This has now started and I am very excited!

My therapist put me at ease during the first session, talking through my panics and anxiety's.  Mainly to work out the biggest problems before we can start to overcome them.  When asked what I want from the course, my reply was a simple one 'I want to be normal'.  I know 'normal' is relative but for me 'being normal' would mean taking my children out and about without thinking about it, to take them on a train to London or just to the zoo.  These may sound like small things to others, but they are massive hurdles to me.

She kept nodding and writing things down which you never know is good or bad.  I found myself actually feeling a little comfortable talking to someone, knowing that she was not judging me.  Her responses were great and started to make me think.  The real work starts next session.  I have been warned, it will be an emotional roller coaster but that does not faze me.  I have been living with this for 12 years on and off and now I have decided it needs to be gone forever.  Only I could make that decision and only I can make that happen.

I will blog after each session just in case you can relate with anything I am saying.  If I can reach out and make one person ask for help, then my work here is done.