Thursday, 27 September 2012

First days at Primary School

My youngest is now nearing the end of her first full week at Primary School.  I am unsure what she has made of it due to the differing reports that come back from her.  I will paint you a picture......

First day, which was a half day, as we walked out of the school, I asked if she enjoyed herself and if she had made any friends - like you would as the expectant mum, making sure it's all alright, more for your own nerves rather than hers - I was met with a smile which changed to a frown.  Then she said "I did like it until we had to tidy up and I didn't like that bit.  So I don't want to go back tomorrow as I don't want to tidy up".  My first reaction was to laugh.  I let out a little giggle and stifled it upon seeing her face.  She was serious.  Oh dear... I explained that there was no choice and she would have to return and learn to enjoy tidying up.  Incidentally, her nursery always commented to me how helpful she was at tidy up time and I had arrived early sometimes to see her sweeping the floor; so I know she does tidy!

After her first full day at school, I knew she would be tired.  As we left, I asked about her day as I do everyday and was met with this reply "Now I have done the afternoon, I don't think I need to do it again so I will stick with mornings".  I had to laugh at this one!  This tiny blonde little monkey was actually trying to negotiate something where there was nothing to negotiate!!  Here started a conversation about how school worked, the fact that you stay all day and there really is no choice.

Yesterday was better and she seems to be settling.  She loves the fact that they now give her stickers or hand stamps for tidying up or good work.  She has come home with the stamp on her face also, where she had been so happy to receive it, she had kissed her hand and in the process, also stamped her face.

Starting school is hard on the parents and the child.  The child has to adjust to new settings, new friends to make and new teachers to listen to.  Parents have to realise that their little people are starting properly on the growing up process and during their school years, they learn the most both academically and emotionally.  That is the scary part; emotions and letting go - just a little, mind you, she is only 4!

Tuesday, 25 September 2012

The 'Fifty Shades' trilogy.

Before reading 'Fifty Shades of Grey', I had heard all sorts of stories about it and some were conflicting as to what the story was actually about.  I have not read a book for a while.  Something that I use to love doing but during depressive times, I could never concentrate.  I feel great at the moment so thought I should have look at the first book but I left it a while.  In the end, my intrigue did get the better of me and I borrowed the book.

It did not take me long to finish reading the first book.  It was an easy read.  The story flowed and for someone who doesn't really like your typical 'love story', this had a different edge to it.  It has your basics, man meets girl, but then, man doesn't see women in the same way you would normally suspect. The man in this tale is Christian Grey.  You do not get to understand him too well in the first book but then I felt the first book was more about the girl - Anastasia Steele - and her finding her feet in 2 new Worlds - relationships and money.  Neither of which she had had previously.

I went out and bought the next 2 books.  'Fifty Shades Darker' is where you see the dynamics change of the relationship between 2 people, who are completely alien to their current environments, it makes them stop and think what it is they want and need from one another.  At first you wonder where the story can go from here.  Then you get to the final chapter and it lays the foundations for book 3.

'Fifty Shades Freed' starts quite softly.  Lulling you into a sense of security between the characters.  Halfway through this security is shattered leaving the story to unfold in a way you really did not think it would.

I would love to write a proper review on these books, but won't because if you haven't read them, anything else I write could and would spoil story lines for you.  I enjoyed the trilogy and I am sure I will read again.  They have also reignited my passion for reading and writing, so thank you E L James and the Fifty Shades Trilogy!!

All alone again....but in a good way!

My youngest has now started Primary School full time.  I am finding the time alone odd but enlightening.  It wasn't like this with my eldest and it made me wonder why.

I had my eldest during studying for my degree, so I was always leaving her either with my mum or in a nursery.  After I got my degree, I went out to work.  This carried on while my emotions jumped and I spiraled more and more into my depression.  I worked at different places, always worked hard and always enjoyed the work.  When she started school, I had just started to get help for post natal depression, which in turn had turn into depression and anxiety issues.  I got help and continued working.  Had a fab job as Marketing Assistant in a College.  Then Junior came along.

We couldn't afford for me to go back to work.  Yes, it is true, nursery fees would have taken all my money.  I was faced with a conundrum.  I enjoyed working, but on reflection, I had totally missed everything with my first daughter.  I had worked the whole time, never had 'at home mummy' time.  My husband and I decided I would stay at home with this daughter.

I have done this for over 4 years now and she has started school.  I have worked bits and pieces in that time - freelancing marketing projects, web sites and even back at the College.  Now she is at school, I want to do something for me again.  I have loved being a stay at home mum and would not have changed it for the World and I intend to do more freelance stuff so I can continue giving my girls the support they need.  After 4 years with her and me all day, every day, it is odd though.  Going out does not need to be planned around a little one.  I can get up and go anywhere. It is in fact quite liberating!  I feel a new surge of energy.  I need to re-establish myself as me.  This is my time.  I just can't wait for things, I want them to happen. Only I can do that. So here goes.........

Monday, 24 September 2012

It's been a while!

The summer holidays took over me and for a while, I have not had a chance to sit and think to myself.  My blog has been a ghost since July and in fact I has missed the writing. 

My youngest started school full time today which means, I have a full day- yes, a FULL day, to plough through things that take twice the time when you have to stop at 11am for nursery pick up.  I have drawn up a list and will start it later.  (Yes, later! I know it does not sound very productive but I am going to help someone with their computer, so in fact, that could be my good deed for the day!)

I know that, as I sit here, at the desk, if I were to turn around, the mess that would confront me is too much to worry about today.  Today is all about me and trying to get a few things into action.  The list looks a little like this:
1) Help a lady with her computer.
2) Blog (currently doing....)
3) Print off 2 novels that I started a few years back, read through them and decide if they are any good to continue and finish.
4) Remind myself of the short stories I wrote and if there is a market for them. (Research needed)
5) Finish an edit job - sister's wedding! Guilt here as the wedding was in April....
6) Web sites - sort, update, create etc.  This is a whole separate list itself!

I think that list will take longer than today but, I will endeavour to touch on everything.

Wish me luck!!