Friday 4 May 2012

I hope the anxiety doesn't creep back

My youngest now does not have a Primary School place for this September.  This is because we rejected the place offered to us.  The school is further away than any on our list and we just want a local school.  That is all, we just want a local school.

We have decided to appeal to all the schools on the list and the reason is simple, pointed out to me by someone close to me.  If I was to do the journey to the allocated primary school, I would be stuck in traffic everyday.  The main road to the school is notorious for traffic just due to the sheer weight of cars going that way during the rush hour.  This to some is not a problem.  For me it could be.  Here is why..... If my IBS is playing up, I need to be near the bathroom.  If during those traffic jams I had a sudden urge, this would induce a panic in me, leading to a rise in anxiety.  In the end, and I know this is true as I know the cycle, I would start the whole saga of panic attacks again resulting in my daughter going late to school when I know the traffic has dispersed.  I do not want to go down that route again.  I have just finished cognitive behavioural therapy for the second time and I am trying to get things back on track.  I really do not want to put myself in a position where my mental health issues affected my daughters schooling.

I really hope the appeal process works or that she is offered a place at any of the schools on the list via the waiting list.  Being offered a place is more favourable so I do not have to go to an appeal board - the last thing I want to do is sit and discuss my issues with a group of strangers whose job it is to judge me and my family.  Goodness knows what they will make of us!